People don’t understand the difficulty being a beacon to the monster world.
I don’t quite know how it happened, but ever since I was a wee welp, the creatures from the other side have been obsessed with capturing me and putting me inside of small crates and little brass cages.
It really isn’t my fault.
I never made fun of them when I’d see them running through the yard, or stealing eggs from the neighbors. But that really is the problem; I see things that others do not.
Or maybe should not.
My punishment is monster abduction. Maybe you’ve got the same problem, I don’t know.
When I tell people about it, they just shake their heads and then rapidly change the subject to talk about their new station wagon.
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It happens mostly at night. (The Abductions.) I hear the chugga-chugga of their steam driven motorcars, the beastial laughter, and finally the claws at my door. Sometimes they’re rough. Sometimes it hurts.
- – -
How they get here from Monstru, I’ll never know. Hell, I don’t even know how I get back, though I’m sure that it has to do with the big rift in the middle of their land. All I know is that I get hit in the head while I’m attempting to escape and I awaken… lately in the desert.
I’m starting to be surprised that I ever make it back at all.
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HA, I called that move with the pegleg!
As for your monster issues, try wearing -only- a florescent pink bowtie to bed, turns out the two things most honest monsters absolutely can’t abide are the color pink and bowties, if you combine the two you have a virtually unbeatable weapon.
And, if it fails to work and you wake up in the desert again… at least you’ll be ready for Burning Man.
Marrock, you totally called it! But I didn’t want to spoil it for you, though.
I’ll give your bowtie thing a try… but it won’t go over my mustache!
Then you get a a clip-on and clip it -to- the ‘stache, problem solved.
I am repelled completely by bow ties.
(Does it spin, light up, squirt water?)
That explains a whole lot.
If someone is wearing a bow tie in the mailing facility, I start to bark uncontrollably and have to leave the building.