Oh Mighty Harmer
This is MPR, Monstru Pirate Radio
Today, we have a special guest, Mr. Steam himself, Kip Cupwhistle (KC)!
MPR: Or should I say “Volton Cogg?”
KC: Kip is me. That is my name.
MPR: So, why so many names?
KC: Sometimes I hunger for a leafy twig.
MPR: I see. So, you like variety, then?
KC: Yes, and no. But mostly yes. Nope.
MPR: Being the newest member of the Steam Crow pirate crew must be exciting?
KC: Oh yes. The dead one yells a good deal. And the red one is sniffy. Good chaps.
MPR: So what really happened with those CrowBots?
KC: I drank some acetone and stabbed them.
MPR: How many?
KC: Five, but one was greenish.
MPR: Why did you stab them?
KC: I don’t like green. I honestly don’t remember.
MPR: Are you going to stab me?
KC: Are you green?
KC: Do you have any acetone?
KC: Then it’s unlikely.
MPR: I see that you have a pumpkin for a head. Is it a real pumpkin?
KC: I’d rather not say. But, I’d rather say “sponge buttons.”
MPR: (Coughs) So, what race are you?
KC: I’m a Pumpkin Golem. A #8 pumpkin golem, to be exact. I’m collectable.
MPR: What do pumpkin golems do?
KC: Gamble, mostly. I have a lucky hat. I call it “Kitten.”
MPR: What’s the most you’ve ever lost in a bet?
KC: I stabbed some CrowBots. And a refridgerator.
MPR: Well, that’s all the time for our transmission today.
MPR: I’d like to thank Kip Cupwhistle, pirate of the 9 highways, for joining us today.
KC: (Sound of sloshing and gallon container rustling.) Hic!
MPR: This is MPR, Monstru Pirate Radio.